Stuck in a Tree: Why I Need God to Father Me First

As I think about the first published writing here, my goal is to share my heart behind why ‘Fathered First’ exists.

In short, I’ve realized the power behind writing out my thoughts and taking the time to reflect on how God is working in my life. In addition, it has been a twofold rekindling for me as it relates to both reading and writing. Two significantly impactful means of growth & self-reflection over my earlier years, that too easily got put to the wayside as life got fuller.

Furthermore, I have this deep-down desire to share how God has re-fathered me and continues to do so as I walk through this journey of following Jesus – as a disciple, husband, father, and friend.

I’ll be the first to admit that I continue to fall short, and I know that perfection is not the answer on this side of Heaven. Yet, I have experienced God’s miracles and blessings in my own life.

The fact that I grew up in a broken home without any Christian role models in the realm of marriage, fatherhood, and overall spiritual maturity continues to remind me of God’s promises that he keeps to those that love Him with all their heart, soul, and strength (Deuteronomy 6:5).

I am in awe and reverence to the showers of grace, mercy, and love that I know I do not deserve, but our God continues to pour out. From where I have come to where I am today, it is nothing short of a miracle.

I see my writings here at ‘Fathered First’ as my own journal that I hope resonates with a father that is trying to lead his family well. Even if it is one dad, that still has the potential to impact many generations to come.

The goal is not perfection, but instead, a heart that slowly begins to be renovated by God from one degree to the next (2 Corinthians 3:18).

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For the second half of this initial entry, I want to share a memory that I recently made sense of in relation to our Heavenly Father.

When I was about six or seven years old, I climbed up a tree in our apartment complex. As I’m sure many kids do, I was able to conquer the climbing up but not so much the climbing down. Clearly, this plan was not very thought out.

Nonetheless, it wasn’t too long until my dad came to the rescue to climb up and help me down.

As I try as best as I can to remember more specific details, I only recall the fact that I climbed, got stuck, and my dad saved me.

Now, I don’t think my dad was a tree climber or even a very fit, active person at the time. But, when he saw his son, his child, stuck up high in a tree and needing help, he did not hesitate to save him.

What strikes me now is that this was the same dad who carried so much brokenness of his own. Yet, in that moment, he didn’t hesitate.

When I reflect on this memory, I am reminded of how God stops at nothing to save us when we are helpless. My dad climbed up to get me. God came all the way down – Jesus left Heaven and hung on a tree of His own to save us once and for all (1 Peter 2:24).

And if we are being honest, it is often our own doing that creates this need. Whether it be our own pride, ego, stubbornness, lack of wisdom, following our own plan, chasing something of this world, you name it – we quickly find ourselves in a position where we truly need saving. Other times, it is not our doing at all – loss, sickness, and seasons of suffering that we never chose. Either way, we are stuck.

What a great God and Heavenly Father that we have – who saved us once and for all and still meets us in our helplessness time and time again. What a blessing!

And here is a thought that keeps coming up for me: I didn’t get myself down from that tree. All I could do was let my dad carry me.

I’ll conclude with this point … as a husband and father, God has entrusted me with the gift (and a weighty responsibility) to lead my wife and children well. I don’t take it lightly, and at the same time – in order for me to lead in the way that God has called me, I need to be Fathered First by my Heavenly Father. I must receive before I can lead. I cannot do it alone.

Without that as my guiding light and focus, I will fall short every time. And even with a heart that is focused on God in the right order, I know that there still will be moments of struggle, suffering, and heartache.

Yet, just like that young boy stuck, helpless in a tree … our God will be faithful. Sometimes He lifts me out, and sometimes He stays with me in it (Isaiah 43:2) – but He never leaves me there alone.

So, for any husband and father – whether you grew up in the church or not, had parents to model the abundant life or not, or are just trying to figure out how to be an intentional, God-fearing parent – my prayer is that ‘Fathered First’ helps you in your journey to glorifying God wherever you are.